Sell Me This Pen

Get this guy the fuck out of my office, is hopefully what you are thinking. Way too often when people are selling they come right out with it, I tend to refer to that as sending the dick pic before asking the girl out to dinner (even after never send a dic pic, even if they ask). So yes your job is to sell and you might be wondering when do you sell to someone? Isn't there that famous saying that once you mention the sale it begins? How do you know if the person needs what you’re selling, did you ask them? I know that's a crazy question to ask because everyone is a potential customer, right? Wrong, not everyone will want to buy your t-shirt, or beard cream just because you made it. Before trying to ram your sales pitch down someone's throat, take a step back and ask some questions to see if they even need what you’re trying to sell. 

Let's see how Danny would sell the pen:


So, tell me, Jordan, how long have you been in the market for a pen? (as pictured above)

I’m not, I don't use pens.

Really? Well, then you can have your lousy pen back.

Danny looked back at the kid and said:

I don't sell things to people who don't need them, I leave that to novices, like you. 

When you are talking with your prospect, regardless of what you are selling your objective is to find out their goals and reduce their pain. If you can find out those two things than you can tailor your sales pitch to benefit them. I can't tell you how many times (hundreds if not thousands) I made the assumption that it was the cost, or the assumption that time was the issue when all the customer wanted was one less headache and could not have cared about the cost. 

Ask, ask, ask, and probe. 

By now you know the 4 objections:





It should be crystal clear by now that trying to sell to someone who doesn't need or want what you are selling is a fool's errand and a complete waste of time. Now let's get into the 4 types of buyers to save you some time.


  • Buyers in Heat 
  • Buyers in Power
  • Tire Kickers 
  • Undeciders   

Buyers in Heat - These are the people that are salivating at buying from you, they will buy anything you’re selling. Now before you get excited, in the beginning this will be virtually no one. These people are obtained by pure luck or ones that have already done business with you and trust you. I have clients who have bought from every one of my products or services and some didn’t even know said product had anything to do with me. These buyers take time to cultivate and are usually already ordered so there isn't much work needed from a sales front. 

Buyers in Power - are almost there, they can afford it, they can benefit from it, however they are just not quite sold on it yet. Most think that the answer is a discount however more often than not, it tends to be the trust or urgency, and depending on how you frame the conversation will determine such things. This is where you want to put all your energy. 

Tire Kickers - these are the ones you want to cut quick, ever have a prospect ask you a dumb ass question that has nothing to do with the sale at hand? Or they reply with a lot of ooos, ahhs and yups. They are great at wasting your time and get joy from it. They tend to ask rhetorical questions yet price to tends to be of no concern to them as they can always afford it. When you start to hear dumb ass questions popping up, nip the conversation in the bud and move on. 

Undeciders - these are like the buyers in power however they have no power, they can barely scratch two pennies together and are the first to jump ship to the cheaper alternative. 

Now if it is not obvious by now your goal is to figure out which category your prospect fits into, the goal is to avoid the bottom two and focus on the top two and continue to move them through your sales funnel. Rinse and motherfucking repeat. 


Do you have balls?

In the Group Chat share a conversation with a buyer in heat (isn't so easy now is it), ok fine let's just focus on the buyers in power. Post a conversation that you’re working on and let's see if we can set up some great questions to probe deeper as to why this person will not buy from you. 

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